I rant, therefore I am. Dennis Miller
A new study finds those who won Nobel Prizes between 1901 and 1950 lived about 2 years longer than nominees who didn't win.
How About A Joke?
One night, a police officer was stalking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the driving under the influence laws. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. Then, sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Everyone left the bar and drove off. Finally, he started his engine and began to pull away.
The police officer was waiting for him. He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered the Breathalyzer test. The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight, I'm the Designated Decoy."
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The Sun has cooled off so your finances won't look quite as bleek this week. You still think you are better than everyone else. Your confidence allows you to get a crew of windshield washers together to work 17th Street. You consider branching out to Off-Ramp Oranges.