I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member. Groucho Marx
The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds.
How About A Joke?
There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"
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neat
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The cosmos is singing your song this week but it's waaaay off key. You are going to be 42 minutes late for everything. You will have an interesting conversation with your microwave mid-week. You rejoice at how much money you are saving now that your hair has completely fallen out.