I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. Steven Wright
Franklin Pierce was the first U.S. President to have a Christmas tree in the White House
How About A Joke?
On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his brand new bike. The cop says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" The kid says, "Yeah." The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike." The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket. The kid takes the ticket and before the cop rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" Humouring the kid, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did." The kid says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top."
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vulgar
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Pluto is moving in with Mercury this week. You feel good until someone explains that when it comes to test results "positive" is not a good thing. Fish hate you and will vow this week to make the rest of your life a living, fishy smelling, hell. Don't read anything.