I rant, therefore I am. Dennis Miller |
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German immigrant, Louis Prang was the first to bring Christmas cards to America. |
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This bartender is in a bar, when this really hot chick walks up and says in a sexy seductive voice, "May I please speak to your manager?" He says, "Not right now, is there anything I can help you with?" She replies, "I don't know if your the man to talk to...its kind of personal..." Thinking he might get lucky, he goes, "I'm pretty sure I can handle your problem, miss." She then looks at him with a smile, and puts two of her fingers in his mouth...and he begins sucking them, thinking "I'm in!!!" She goes, "Can you give the manager something for me?" The bartender nods...yes. "Tell him there's no toilet paper in the ladies restroom."
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whacky
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Everyone around you will remind you that you are named after a horrible disease. You will grow a new mole on your left cheek. Not a beauty mark like Cindy Crawford, an actual, tunnel digging, garden killing, blind rat. You name him Pedro and try to befriend him, but he sees right away that you just want to use him to get rid of those weeds on the right side of your face.
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